raised you .

By Dorie U . Sugay

Dorie Sugay is the Executive Director of Visiting Angels , a company that provides living-assistance services to seniors and adults-in-need who wish to stay in their own home or receive oneon-one care within a facility .

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This article is for informational and educational purposes only . It was written independent of Visiting Angels .

G I L R O Y T O D A Y W I N T E R / H O L I D A Y 2 0 1 2 driving privileges from a teenager is tough but not as heart-wrenching as taking the same privileges from the parent who

Some adults are able to drive through their later years . But others are no longer safe on the road . When you visit for the holidays , take the time to assess how Mom and / or Dad are doing . You want to look for ways to help them be able to continue to drive safely , rather than look for ways to take the keys away . This approach will help you get their cooperation later , if you do need to ask them to give up driving ! Take a walk around the car , check out the entrance to the garage , the bush on the curb , and even the garbage can . Have them take you on a tour of their area , taking their usual routes – you will learn a lot .

Here are other things to make a note of :

• Have they received a warning from the police for poor driving behavior ? They won ’ t necessarily tell you but you should ask about a citation .

• Are there signs of close calls , minor collisions - dents or scratches on the car ? Does the garbage can look abused ? How is the entrance to the garage ? Why did they have the bush by the curb removed ? Is it because they can ’ t control the car , or is Mom driving Dad ’ s car and it is too big ?

• When you drive with them – are they relaxed and confident ? ( When you are confident , it does not matter who is with you , so don ’ t let them convince you they are nervous because you are there . But do emulate their life as well as you can – don ’ t have screaming kids in the back seat ).

• Does driving tire them out ? If so – why ? It is best to avoid times when people are going to / from work or dropping / picking up kids at school .

• Does Mom or Dad get disoriented easily ?

• How is his / her ability to react to an unexpected challenge ? Especially in the winter months when the roads are moist , this could be a big issue . Just because they drive 4 blocks to the store does not mean they won ’ t run into crazy drivers .

• Does he / she have difficulty dealing with glaring objects ? ( street lights , headlights , etc ). Choosing driving times can solve this issue .

• How are they when they change lanes ? If they have difficulty looking over their shoulder or turning their head side to side , that means they are not at 100 % capacity .

• How well can they see street signs , curbs , people / objects on or around the road ? ( if they get easily distracted , is the solution as simple as turning the radio off ?)

• How well does he / she navigate and deal with obstacles and distractions ?

• Do speeding cars frighten or distract them ?

• Do other drivers tailgate or pass them all the time ? Are they able to stay calm when this happens or do the noise and speed rattle them ? Remember , sometimes very slow driving can cause accidents .

• How is their hand / foot coordination ?

• If your loved one takes medications for a prior stroke , ALS , dementia , epilepsy , MS , Parkinson ’ s disease , seizure or sleep disorders , or uncontrolled diabetes - these could affect driving ability .

• Was his / her license checked at age 70 ? There have been times that people who should no longer drive pass the test – if you have good reason to believe your parent should no longer drive , you can talk to the DMV about it confidentially . A note from their physician helps . According to a the Highway Patrol , usually it is best for someone in their 70s to be checked at least every 3 years , and after 80 , to be checked every year . When you assess if it is time to have

“ that talk ”, you might first talk to their physician . But be warned - they may find that a breech of their privacy if you share your concerns with their doctor without their knowledge . It is a blessed rarity when